“As girls, we always want to look presentable, clean, and pretty.” – Author Unknown

BARF. Gag me with a spoon and shove it up your tookus (said lovingly). Does anyone know who wrote this crap? I saw it on Pinterest some months back and rolled my eyes at all the ‘likes’ and repins. Really, people? Are we still stuck in the 1950’s? Or the 1850’s? Or better yet, the beginning of human civilization? Damn you, Eve! *sarcastic eyeroll*

You can probably sense how much stock I give to that age-old fairy tale, also known as, “The Uterus Is 666!” Just in case anyone forgot: you, your forefathers, their forefathers — every person created since the dawn of time — came from a woman’s womb. Nothing dirty about that (unless you count the afterbirth, which is more messy than dirty). I’m still sore I didn’t get to consume my placenta after delivery. It probably would have helped with the suicidal postpartum depression I experienced. At the very least, I would have appreciated the prospect of recycling.

My take on keeping up appearances/putting too much stock into your exterior: ladies, look ratty AF if you like. Roll around in the dirt like pigs gone wild. Pretty is as pretty does. If you want to look like a supermodel, power to you. If you want to look like a potato, you also have my vote. Personally, I fluctuate between passing-for-human and a resembling a smol ogress, but that’s just me!

Seriously, though…please don’t give a flying saucer’s fuck about what others — men, other women, furries in the form of goats, sheep, llamas, lions, donkeys, dogs, cats, bears, gorillas, wolves, and the list goes on — think about your looks (unless, of course, it’s part of your job req to present yourself in a certain way, and you’re fine with upholding your boss’ standards).

Even with all the grrl power in the solar system, you will still be judged. Not gonna lie — I’m guilty of assessing a person’s outer attractiveness, though I’m harshest on myself. Judging is a bad habit, but it happens to the best (and worst) of us. The bottom line is trite, but true: no one else’s opinion should trump your own. No, the Donald does not own the monopoly on that verb. But I digress.

You will not find proof of your self-worth in anyone else’s eyes. Don’t disguise yourself simply for the sake of gaining admirers and/or approval (I’m not referring to the women who simply love makeup and wear it for the aesthetic value, as an art form, battle armor, etc.). Own your beauty, damnit! Fuck society’s — your family’s, boyfriend’s, girlfriend’s, random people’s — expectations of your attractiveness. Don’t float in the shallow pond full of other wannabes who wish they didn’t hate themselves more than they hate you…anyway, aren’t haters actually your number-one fans? They can’t go a day without compulsively checking your feeds and plotting ways to make you suffer to avoid examine their own shortcomings. If that’s not the definition of total obsession, I don’t know what is.

Watch the lemmings drop one by one. Rejoice in the fact that you know when to back away from the edge of the cliff; and remember: you can choose to perceive yourself as beautiful. Look in the mirror often if you like. Or never look again, if that suits you better. You are more than a reflection, and ignore anyone who tries to convince you otherwise — especially when that person is you.

What’s the worst appearance-related insult anyone’s ever hurled at you, and how did it affect your self-confidence? Alternatively, you could share the best compliment about your personality you’ve ever received. Either way, I’d like to hear from you.


Join the conversation! 2 Comments

  1. “Pantyhose are part of the uniform.” Fuck their double standards! I wore pants!

    Liked by 1 person

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About Jane Bled

Jane bled out.


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